poetry critical

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stretched writing
sparrow

I wake up in the dark
 1
feeling dizzy in my lack
 2
of sleep - too stretched
 3
inside to write a poem.
 4

27 May 07

Rated 6.3 (6.3) by 3 users.
Active (3): 3, 7, 9
Inactive (0):

(define the words in this poem)
(38 more poems by this author)



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Comments:

poems about poems scare me.
 — unknown

sorry, didn't mean to scare ya:-)
 — sparrow

Not interesting in the least. Write something that takes a little more effort. I know you can sparrow. I've read some works of yours that are better. 7/10
 — Henry

thanks for your comment Henry:-)
I agree that I've some of my other poems are better...this was also just the starting point before I wrote the poem I posted right after this one.
and the fact that it's a bit "stretched" and not very dense was kindof the message I was trying to make.
 — sparrow

gotta keep spaces before and after that hyphen. yes.
nice pome about
writing about
not writing. nice
pome.
 — varun

forget
that
comma
too
three
four
get
that comma
 — varun

thanks
for
the
idea
I think
I ll fix the
punctuation

:-)
 — sparrow

hooookay
gladyoutookmysuggestion/s
 — varun

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