poetry critical

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ghosts
papermoon

today is the day
 1
tomorrow too late
 2
and I too weak
 3
to hear echoes in
 4
hallways
 5
telling how
 6
to feel, pounding
 7
in my head
 8
erupts
 9
a popped balloon
 10
shatters
 11
and scars
 12
useless pieces
 13
become
 14
like new
 15
something true
 16
original form
 17
falling fast
 18
 
 
decadence is beauty,
 19
breakdown
 20
a dance for two
 21
circles in my head
 22
blood in bed,
 23
 
 
it feels like home.
 24

23 May 07

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Comments:

can you explain line 19 a bit?
 — Trish77

I will try my best. Decadence is the act of falling or weakening so in that line, I am stating that that can represent beauty - aka beauty in the breakdown - which is signifined in the next line with the single word. Does that help any? I know this poem is sort of all over the place - I was trying something new.
 — papermoon

Dear Papermoon

I admire the bravery of your experimental lines.

Larry stuck in the old groove lark
 — larrylark

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