poetry critical

online poetry workshop



Dedicated to Henry
unknown

A man of great talent,
 1
you are always there,
 2
ever present,
 3
on the site,
 4
offering crits
 5
of little sustenance
 6
with your trademark
 7
two out of ten.
 8
 
 
Oh, how I wish
 9
I could write like you,
 10
force my rhymes
 11
like constipation,
 12
reading like
 13
the end result
 14
of hard, knobbly
 15
painful poo.
 16
 
 
And my heart's desire
 17
eats me up.
 18
Why have you
 19
so many friends
 20
who back you up?
 21
Maximilian, deathshards,
 22
not forgetting Jillian.
 23
Alter egos, ten in a million.
 24
 
 
You are a man
 25
with no depth.
 26
Life is simply
 27
back and white.
 28
No grey areas in your life,
 29
just lots of personality!!
 30

14 Apr 07

Rated 5.3 (8.8) by 3 users.
Active (3): 1, 5, 10
Inactive (3): 10, 10, 10

(define the words in this poem)



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Comments:

the last line is a fallacy.
 — unknown

what is this ... the season of ridicules?
 — trochee

lalala, it's got my name in it :D
 — DeathShards

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha rated 1/10 by Henry
 — unknown

Now I do think that sometimes I offer an okay critique, and if my trademark rating was 2/10 than why is my average rating 6.5? You make little sense here.
And about forcing rhymes...you are I believe the first person to say that about my poems. Well, some of the poems my have forced rhyme, but not really. You are definitely the first.
Maximilian is one of my friends, Deathshards is someone I've never met (just a good poet on the site), and Jillian is my girlfriends best friend and someone I drove to college yesterday. And what does, alter egos 10 in a million mean?
But overall I think this was very sweet of you. I do not hold grudges you know. I wish you had left a name to this. So I can give credit where credit is due. This is all in good fun, just tottally accurate in the least. Thanks though. 5/10
 — Henry

well this is refreshing when most writers just stoop name calling. actually this is quite a nice piece. but i have a soft spot for poo in poetry
 — ilenelush

HAHA everyone should read this
 — unknown

Well, it's about time I got a dedication. I was hoping it would be a bit better though. And I was hoping it'd rhyme like most of my dedications for others do. I can't be picky though. Thanks. Just let your name be known. Are you Rull? That little guy is so funny. He has 265 poems and he only comments on his own poems with his username visible. You'd think after that many poems, his poetry would improve?
 — Henry

Is Henry gay?
 — unknown

Are you suggesting that Henry's stupidity is somehow linked to homosexuality?  Don't offend the homosexual population by trying to shove Henry into their midst.  
 — unknown

Homsexual's have not rights.
 — unknown

We just want to know if Henry is a faggot or not.
 — unknown

Well someone is obviously quite jealous.
 — homepancakes

This websight has too many gays on it.
 — unknown

Ha ha ha, excellent.
 — unknown

line 28 "black"
 — trochee

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