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the syntax is bubbling, bursting forth like gold
but i'll probably fuck it up & piss all over the seat.
        thank you, mister whitney
        thank you, missus oh
"it's days like these that will" peel me in deux
simply because the air is like un milliard balloons.
        thank you, mister slimane
        thank you, missus coppola
& i might never know the sound of apple core,
the taste of soixante city nights
        thank you.

26 Mar 07

Rated 6.3 (6.3) by 3 users.
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this is sheerly beautiful. thankyou.
 — ribcages

Why, thank you.
 — mixtapeboy

Familiar with your previous work, I can say that this piece shows a great deal of refinement in your writing character, as well a distinct voice that is mildly rebellious, mildly beautiful, and very personal.  Though the reader may not be familiar with some of the names given here, it can be surmised without doing research that these figures are the inspiration of the piece, the inspiration of the messy, lovely, avant garde persona of the writer.  All praise a side, this is really quite a step in the direction of original high quality.
 — Mithrandir

I agreed with you a few days ago, Mithrandir, but now I am not so sure. It'd be appreciated if someone would point out areas of weakness or just inform me the entire thing blows.
 — mixtapeboy

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