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The abortionist

The doctor was as usual,
busy killing inside the room.
His female patient, a medium
to perform his heinous act.
A fine man his victim
might grow to become.
But we'll never know
and his father doesn't care.

25 Mar 07

Rated 5 (5) by 3 users.
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i hate this issue so much...not the poem, just the issue.
the poem is okay. i was just hoping it would be longer when i clicked on the title a few seconds ago, but at the same time you capture so much in such a tiny amount of words. i'm just more an adjective person, if you get what i'm saying...good job though.
 — Cherish

thanks dear. i couldn't really write a long poem about this issue so there.
 — miss_minx

Touches my heart. You write about this subject well. Has the sharp ring of truth about it.
 — angrychick

i really hate this poem. especially how the woman's just a passive object that's being ploughed by the father and the abortionist (what's your gender btw, if you don't mind me asking?) she's an adult who makes her own decisions, flawed or not, and your poem would improve if it explored this and attempted to understand the situation, rather than just resorting to smug moral pedantics.

of course, it's your call. use my advice if it appeals to you.
 — Virgil

Aren't you supposed to crit the poem not the subject? I agree it is judgmental but as a poem it speaks volumes.
 — angrychick

virgil, i'm a girl. and in her situation right now.so shut up if you don't know what you're talking about. and you better be a woman as well.
 — miss_minx

angrychick, yes thank you dear.i appreciate your comments.
 — unknown

miss minx, no wonder you write so well about this if it is true for you. I don't know if you have made your decision yet and I hope you come to the right one for you. Just wanted to say this, I feel for you too as I too have been in this situation. I won't tell you what I did unless you want me too cos I don't wanna influence you. Just know others have been in these circumstances too may help a little. Sorry for going on but this poem struck a chord of empathy in me.
 — angrychick

it's comforting to know that. and i'm still thinking about it but my decision's pretty much final. i'm going to take this poem out soon. u take care.
 — unknown

angrychick, i did critique the poem and not the subject. i have no better an understanding of her situation after i read it than before, and that's why i hate it.

 — unknown

i have no problems with abortion.

the right to choose is more important than over-populating the planet with more hungry mouths to feed.

the poem however is well constructed and scans nicely.
 — Mongrol

The doctor kept busy
in the killing room.

His patient,
helping him
a heinous
disappearing act.

The victim
(it's a boy!)
might have
a fine man.

We'll never know.
His own father
doesn't even care.

The poem is too blunted somehow.
 — Isabelle5

I'm sorry that any woman has to even consider this as a choice.  I'm sorry that the subject is more important sometimes than the poem.  I'm sorry that there isn't enough birth control on Earth to prevent some little egg and sperm from coming together and sparking a new life into existence.

I'm sorry for all the women who have gone through it and the fathers who didn't get a choice or a vote.  I'm sorry for the parents who needed that child, even if the birth parents didn't.

Sometimes life is just that way, nothing but sorrow.  
 — Isabelle5

fuck this shit.
 — bologna

i agree Isabelle - more birth control

but still - rather abortion that unwanted unneeded population filling the cities with even more dissolute members of society

more care for those already here please :)
 — Mongrol

Mongrol, as I have mentioned before, my own mother was told to have abortions for me and my two younger brothers, due to her heart condition.  I like to think that it would have made a difference without me here.  My own father might have been aborted as his mother was 16, uneducated, cleaned houses for a living...abortion is not a remedy to the real problem.  Babies are precious and every single one has a place here.  There are many options besides abortion.

However, I do not judge the women who have to make the decision.  It appears to be one of the most personal, most profound and most heartwrenching of all decisions a mother will ever have to make.  They are mothers, they just don't have the babies to prove it.  We grieve...
 — Isabelle5

The very word "abortion" already shows a bias.
I don't think it's fair to judge the poem based on the subject and the perspective it takes.

I really do like the poem's bluntness. Watering down would be an injustice.

It would be interesting to see another 8-lined poem that couples this presenting the opposite side.
 — Rixes

i think a little more subtlety should come into play.

here is my suggestion for a rewrite:

abortion is bad
abortion is bad
abortion is bad
abortion is bad.

is bad. abortion
bad. abortion is
 — bologna

Lacks any subtlety. The poet wears clogs.
 — unknown

Hah! Just seen Bolog's comment! Brilliant!
 — unknown

Heya agin Isabelle - well being male my experiences of abortion are at best second hand. Yes i've also had some personal family experiences - including miscarriages - abortions and some unhappy situations leading to surgery.

Still through all of this, looking at this objectively, though the emotional issue here is plain - I would still vote for pro-choice. Whaqt one person decides to do with their body is no business of anyone elses. Our moralities are not the same through out society and to impose a blanket set is plainly wrong.

At the end of this, though we may all have an opinion, it is not our choice to decide whats best for another, wether it is an unformed feotus in a womb or a fully mature woman with her own informed cogniscense to choose.

Life does not always win out here, it is not the pre-eminent consideration, and though we may struggle with the tradgedies that have hit our own lives - it should not be those that forms our opinions of how others should live.

Im sorry for your situations though - and cant find find words to offer in way of comfort.
But perhaps look to whats beautiful to you, and hold on to that as tightly as you can.

 — Mongrol

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