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Fertilized Deserts

I went to Red Lobster,
and I looked into the troubled eyes
of my dinner
as I passed by their tank.
We exchanged a glance
through the glass tank of my heart.
Not only do I have crabs,
I have lobsters.
A crustacean infestation
broke out on the plantation
which I say with jubilation--
I was there that very day.
I went and got my fill
from my waiter known as Phil,
and I go to pay the bill,
to the counter-worker Will.
I did not have enough money,
and my looks wouldn't even pay for the appetizers,
so they sold me to slavery.
I now work plucking feathers
from the chickens in the den.

This is a true story. It will be in my book released in May of this year. Look for it. I will be at book signing in a bookstore near you.

10 Mar 07

(define the words in this poem)
(6 more poems by this author)

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Let me know if you get to Miami.  Books & Books is great for their promotion of serious writers like you.   L16 seems to want a comma after "worker".  Suggestion for L18:
"and my looks would pay
even for appetizers"
(two lines, to aid cadence)

Say, would you look sometime at this poem of mine?
http://poetry.tetto.o rg/read/39352/
I'd appreciate that very much.
Kind regards,
 — netskyIam

oops! "wouldn't" (my typos, arrgh, sorry)
 — netskyIam

I was with you until L13, the rhyme attack in S3 appears unwarranted.
It seems like the poem went from serious to flippant and then to bizzare.
 — unknown

I have specific ideas for this poem's refinement and would put them down here if you're interested in a second-helping of opinion.  Let me know...
 — netskyIam

I would love to hear some of your ideas Netsky, it would be greatly appreciated.
 — Ajambo