poetry critical

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wife says i can't be drunk at 11:30 in the morning

is that written
in some book of consequence?
or did oprah squeeze another edict
from her cavernous
you're scaring me justin,
this is disgusting,
look at yourself!
this has to stop.
no, no baby,
you don't understand,
this fortifies me against the boogeyman
and other limitations
of circumstance.
she slams the door
in my face
and stomps away.
i fling it open
charge after her,
come here baby!
i'll slam it up your ass
and make things copacetic.
i'll even plow
your root
with my tongue.
she starts shaking
and crying
on the bed.
i hold my junk
in my hand
and point it at her face
bam! pow! zap!
see baby!
he's hungry,
ready to fire!
she sprints from the room
grabs my son
and they disappear
out the front door.
i flip a new bottle
and stand at the window.
the sun
is mid sky,
stench of a thousand
dead civilizations
upon me
and i feel
the ancient urge
to gore a bitch
more understanding
than my wife.

24 Feb 07

Rated 5.7 (5.7) by 3 users.
Active (3): 5, 5, 7
Inactive (0):

(define the words in this poem)

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i need some to think up a proper comment after reading this four times.
 — WordsAndMe

wow you really let rip, but in an intelliigent and understandable manner. I know the feeling you describe. Thank you for posting.
 — unknown

i've been there and done it, so by that i have proven your title wrong. as for the poem, i simply didn't get why half of the words were needed. far too excessive.
 — Esoteric

no doze d.
 — unknown

this is crap
 — Mongrol

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