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Horror Movie

Its times like these that I feel
like we’re in a horror movie,
darting through the hallways
of our own home, the sound
of a chainsaw whirring behind us.
Last night we were huddled together
in the corner of our bedroom during
a thunder storm, a dresser dragged
in front of the door, my palm slapping
the side of a flashlight as it flickered out.
This morning he was in the room
with us again, you were yanking and
pulling on the window that wouldn’t open,
I was grabbing the lamp next to me,
turning whatever I could into a weapon.
And now, in the scramble and fight
between us all, his mask has been torn off,
he is not the madman from the highway
chasing after a random prey
to quench his never ending lust for violence.
We are not burdened by a tragedy
from the world’s endless vault
of fate and chance, leaving us shaking
our fists at a god we cannot
understand, cannot even believe in.
It is a monster that I created years ago,
the one we convinced ourselves was not
growing in our basement, its grumblings
you could hear at night, and me, turning
on my side, telling you ‘it’s nothing’.
Now he is out, and the weight
of him on my back is crushing me
and I am begging you to pull him off of me,
take whatever object you can find
and hit him over the head with it,
and when I am free and he goes after you,
knocking you down with one blow,
dropping to his knees to strangle you,
I will jump on his back
until you are out from under him,
and we will fight him into submission,
send him limping in tattered clothing
out the door, fleeing into the shadows
of the past, leaving just you and me, alone,
in this room we have furnished together.

11 Feb 07

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This was well written with an easy flow.  L1 "Its" should be It's, just to be picky.

I assume, as per L32,39 references to "on my/his back"  that the monster is an addiction.   But I'm not sure.  Perhaps developing that in L1 - times like what? or L26 - I created him how?  But I don't know how you'd do this without disrupting the 5 line stanzas.   Whatever the monster is, it might also be alluded to in L43,44 rather than "shadows of the past".  Here you have some room to play.  

Otherwise, good job.
 — bellavida

oh oh you cheated on your girl - she's a gonna get you
 — unknown

I see I see I see
 — unknown

Is that what the monster is?  I've lived a sheltered life and I'm much more fluent in my native tongue.

There's a math poem that doesn't make sense to me too, that I need interpreting from martian to venusese.  Any assistance?
 — bellavida

I really like this.

I think the metaphorical monster on his back refers to the unsaid things within the relationship/marriage. A sense of being unable to stop the fighting or let go of the water under the bridge - despite wanting to.

Its a sad poem, one that starts in total despair but I like the shift in emotion towards the ending. With the narrator making the resolution thatt he IS going to conquer whatever it is that is causing the horror film - and be at peace, when it no longer exists.

Well done.
 — PollyReg

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