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Winter Girl
Notecompsure

Beauty is what is hidden,
 1
Which is why I love civilization.
 2
It's got us wearing clothes,
 3
Disguising what we mean with words, and
 4
Lying to ourselves about our lives.
 5
Creating castles to be taken by the tide.
 6
 
 
And although my inner visions
 7
Are probably different than yours,
 8
I'd love for you to be my winter girl.
 9
And bundle up in coats,
 10
Hats and scarves,
 11
Mittens, sweaters,
 12
Long-underwear,
 13
Wool socks, and boots,
 14
Maybe some snowpants over that,
 15
Until Only your eyes can be seen.
 16
So that your windows are forced open.
 17
 
 
And I can see you
 18
Winter Girl.
 19

7 Feb 07

Rated 9.5 (9.5) by 2 users.
Active (2): 9, 10
Inactive (0):

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Comments:

This is quite beautiful. Originality is always a plus for me. I assume that's a typo in line 5, when you say "are" lives. Love line 6, but the whloe poem is quality. Well chosen final 2 lines, make foe a well rounded poem.
 — icepineapple

Yes, quite lovely. A 10 from me, though i would prefer less puctuation is does seem in keeping with yr meaning.
 — unknown

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