poetry critical

online poetry workshop



so my mother's a drug addict
fdostoev

it started with prescription vicodin
 1
after she broke her back in a car accident
 2
then for whatever reason
 3
as if its a science
 4
she wanted more
 5
started stealing it from the emergency room
 6
where she was nurse manager
 7
they let her resign
 8
but the next hospital pressed charges
 9
then she went the multiple doctor route
 10
but they caught on
 11
so my aunt calls me on the phone the other day
 12
some guy mom went to school with
 13
a known dealer
 14
and people have seen mom's car there
 15
so its come to that
 16
and here i am
 17
driving over there to speak with him
 18
baseball bat on my passenger seat
 19
knowing full well she'll find another way
 20
if she wants to
 21
futility
 22
the futility in everything we do.
 23

27 Jan 07

Rated 10 (10) by 1 users.
Active (1): 10
Inactive (0):

(define the words in this poem)
(85 more poems by this author)



Add A Comment:
Enter the following text to post as unknown: captcha

Comments:

If your mothers a drug addict. Help her and comfort her. You should throw in some punctuation to even out the emotion in the poem. This poem is like a story, but written like a poem. Just add in punctuation where you think the poem could get out of control. Right now the reader is reading and reading and the emotion never stops. This is a great poem though.
 — shortee

Hello Justin.  You are above rules.  The poem is a prose poem, primarily.
I do hear and like the back/ac-cident assonance.  Line breaks here are thought-breaks;
cadences; and they are faultless.   The finish is sublime.  It's just perfect.  This is your life.  And it never lies.   Therefore, it is not futile.  You're on truth-path.  I'm so pleased for you sir.
 — netskyIam

[Comment removed by moderator.]

[Comment removed by moderator.]

Sorry, Justin.  Trolls trail for those they cannot touch, me and you.
 — netskyIam

[Comment removed by moderator.]

aha netskyIam, there's the rub. is it really this person's life,
or is it simply literature?
good writing, either way.
 — unknown

Top Rated (expand)
Newest (expand)
Recently Commented (expand)
0.538s