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In This Sea
JoelJosol

I stand close enough
 1
to where the sea
 2
can reach
 3
 
 
my feet,
 4
breaking
 5
into white foam,
 6
 
 
in a tug-of-war
 7
with the wind,
 8
my shadow too
 9
 
 
the waters
 10
disrupt,
 11
burying my toes.
 12
 
 
I look at you
 13
from this safe distance,
 14
keeping watch
 15
 
 
for your return,
 16
aware of the strength
 17
of your pull
 18
 
 
the power
 19
you have over me,
 20
there
 21
 
 
in your eyes
 22
that you coldly
 23
withdrew
 24
 
 
while I
 25
wade farther into
 26
the waters
 27
 
 
to follow you
 28
deeper into a sea
 29
that I fear.
 30
 
 
Now, here you are
 31
swirling around me
 32
confusing
 33
 
 
my thoughts,
 34
my bearing,
 35
my balance.
 36
 
 
You overwhelm me
 37
with your tides, and
 38
with your waves
 39
 
 
until I
 40
have no more space
 41
to breathe
 42
 
 
between
 43
your crests and troughs
 44
that pulsate
 45
 
 
like my heart
 46
in these waters,
 47
in this sea.
 48

7 Jan 07

Rated 8.7 (8.7) by 3 users.
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Comments:

Well done!
 — mmmarkun

Thanks mmmarkun for your feedback.
 — JoelJosol

Whow... I really like this! It feels cold... But very good too...
 — dele

Revised to maintain a consistent verb tense.
 — JoelJosol

love it.

the sense of distance between people, the unrequited love is very well described
 — Mongrol

This is very nice! JoelJosol: I'm sure it is not a coincidence that, when you turn the poem on its side, it forms waves?? Or is it just my overactive imagination??
 — JustineCH

Justine, you're right :-)
 — JoelJosol

Truly excellent well crafted poem that flows beautifully.

Larry smooth as silk Lark
 — larrylark

Thank you, Larry.
 — JoelJosol

Extended the poem a little bit into the sea.
 — JoelJosol

Retitled the poem to make it a bit specific.
 — JoelJosol

Retitled to avoid giving away the content of the poem.
 — JoelJosol

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