| i'llikeu |
gnormal
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i'llikeu in hawaii
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1 |
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i'llikeu with a spoon
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2 |
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i'llikeu up my stairs
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3 |
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i'llikeu in my room
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4 |
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i'llikeu when ulikie
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5 |
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the thoughts upon my wall
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6 |
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i'llikeu drinkin glenomade
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7 |
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isowanchutu comtucall!
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8 |
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i'llikeulookie this one!
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9 |
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ulikie? it's for you!
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10 |
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i'llikeu when u'llookie here
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11 |
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olookie lookieoo!
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12 |
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21 Aug 03 |
Rated 7.9 (7) by 22 users.
Active (22): 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 8, 8, 9, 9, 9, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10
Inactive (20): 1, 1, 2, 2, 2, 2, 4, 6, 6, 7, 7, 8, 8, 8, 9, 9, 9, 10, 10
(define the words in this poem)
(159 more poems by this author)
(10 users consider this poem a favorite)
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Comments:
This poem made me smile. I'm sure I'm pronouncing some of the words wrong, but it sounds so cool anyways. Nice work here poet of "I'kkikeu."
Obviuosly you took sounds/words from the Hawaiian language. Clever idea. The last line's great!~Chris King 10/10
— FrChris
This is so much fun to read that I think my grand-daughters would love it. Very clever. Was it as much fun to write?
— Isabelle5
Sort-of clever.
— Moth
Whimsical but it works - nice to read something light-hearted.
— susanna15
gnormal, are you a published poet? because you damn well ought to be.
two years, so far, of college english under my belt, and it's rare to see poets as consistently talented as you.
— unknown
This makes me laugh. I particularly like line 8.
My primary critical comment on this is about the structure: the first verse is all "i'llikeu"s, but the second and third "i'llikeu" only on 1 and 3, and end with exclamations. "Techinically", to keep the formation, I'd suggest that the first verse be modified to fit the pattern of the others, or that it be lengthened, so that the first verse would operate as an intro. But it really doesn't need that.
What might be nice is if the first verse (or something similar, keeping with the nonsensical seduction scheme) was repeated at the end. It doesn't need to be, but if it was then that scheme would be a more solid part of it. But since it's primarily just silly wordplay, I don't know if you'd want to go that route or not.
— semaj
eelookielikeaman. dkm
— unknown
Heheh. Cute. :)
— honestcrime
Hilarious. Very clever use of what could nearly be called gibberish.
— JohnB
Lol. this is great.
— silolater
It's cute.
— abby
brillozabar!
— onklcrispy
hahaha.. this made me laugh =P first paragraph was pretty kinky
— lilminx506
I think it's cute!
— unknown
how naughty-whimsy. hehe it makes me smile.
i like how lines 7-8 break words, it feels slippery.
— lai
It works well, but it didn''t make me smile... or laugh, clever though.
— Leanan
Scrumptious!
— OKcomputer
too confusing.. clever though
— SweetxMemory
sniceoviu tomake this
sniceoviu towrite
sniceoviu totakethetime
toshare tisnicedelite
— noodleman
awwww. so cute. =)
— unknown
beautiful!!it´s so cute wow!!it make me laugh!!!! i love it!!!!
good job!!!8D....lol!
— unknown
this poem invalidates the legitimacy of this site
— unknown
awww its so cute!!
— sabz3003
i couldnt get anyhting from this poem, sorry, love poems are incredibly hard to write well because it has been done so many times before the theme and structure left me going so what?
sorry if i was harsh but i seriously didnt like this poem.
— JFThompson
Did you mean to write drinking lemonade, instead of "i'llikeu drinkin glenomade" in line 7?
— Lia
why say one thing
when you can say two?
— gnormal
why say two
when you can say nothing at all?
— Lia
No, seriously, I love this poem, it's in my favourites, has beem since the first time I read it. I was just trying to possibly point out an error, as I wasn't sure exactly what you meant.
— Lia
oh hello! i just bumped into you in the hall where the random poem was suffocatingrass.
— gnormal
oh look someones little kid wrote a poem, how cuuute.
— bianca
Its weird. The first stanza was ok, but the rest of it makes you sound like a mental patient.
— marchhare
Ha ha! ilikie
— hobby
What a wonderful, fun random Friday poem. I like this even better two years later.
— Isabelle5
and this is one em poems
that looks real dumb
but in reality
so much fun
i could see the chipmunks doing dis
with pavaroti
next christmas in october
thank you
Betty Croquet
— unknown
Ohmy. That is by far the stupidest piece of poetry I've ever read!! A favorite.
It helped that I sang it to myself.
— Infrangible
makes no sense.
— unknown
It seems that you are back in fashion! Well deserving.
— winter
This is just gibberish. Nothing of substance.
— unknown
this is so cute, it's almost disgusting. almost. oh man i love it! gahhh.
— ruyi
this reminds me a lot of silverstein's runny babbit. outstanding.
— chloroplasty
hey, da kine ok for me. when yu coming do haiku for merwin? he da man. we all fine haiku and make luau for all the people here. make the poetry critical rock. that ok.
dumb old fisherman,
poking his stick at the fish:
"die!! stupid poets!!"
aloha
— mikebauer
Mikebauer is an asshole.
— unknown
yes, but i can out-write you, out-think you, and i'm funnier too. my dik's only average size though, and maybe yours is bigger? would that make it so you could win?
hey, blue ribbon!!
— mikebauer
very cute - I know hawaiian has only 7 letters in the alphabet
do your fun words conform to the hawaiian alphabet?
very funny
— unknown
akshully, that's in local-kind talk, and uses american. hawaiian language sound actually has about 40 sounds to make, but the missionaries reduced the alphabet for simplicity.
— mikebauer
It's hard to enjoy your poem when that Asshole mikebauer commented on it.
— unknown
the bag-lady's back! hi, bag-lady, who you screaming about now? mr. reagan again??
— mikebauer
Nice poem about a language from another place i'll never get a chance to visit.
Larry home is where the heart is Lark
— larrylark
really fun and clever
— tillmorgan
enjoyed thoroughly, classy poem.
— unknown
ick. Write in english.
— unknown
YES GNORMAL DO AS UNKNOWN COMMANDS YOU
— unknown
creative, and very seusslike. I like it, though I find it a little overrated by the others, still good though
— mike_kelley
This is poetry?
— unknown
I reckon gnorm must have the 'onesters' by the balls. :)
— unknown
ilikey u'rhythm
ilikey u'nerve
ilikey that this poem
gets da props that it deserve...
very cute!
initially, it was a challenge to read it, but once one makes that effort, it all just comes together perfectly. this is something one with a stick up their ass could never get into. I, on the other hand, don't know of nor possess such a frigidity within me-self. yeah! I likey!
— starr
This is unique. And I gotta say, that I had to read it over once more because of the spelling.
— pl_rose03
great
— Virgil
i likie
— unknown
HAHAHAHAHA! I forgot all about this one. Noodles did something like this about his mother once - it stumps you and then you catch on.
Great humorous writing.
— Isabelle5
i am reading this in hawaii. right now. how deliciously fitting!! my girlfriend and i are laughing. i esp. love the rhythm to lines 9 and 10!
— humblebee
iredit on the toilet
iredit on the bed
iredit on the kitchen floor
lredit taking med
fun and foolish, it's good to read something that's not morbid, depressed, angry or self consciously intellectual.
— skinnyJon
now i have a migraine
— unknown
It's wickedly clever and fun but I'm really struggling with the fact that it's so highly rated.
— rrichards5
watch richard struggle.
poor richard.
— unknown
I'm struggling along with Richard. Cute, but that's about it. To mention it in the same breath as Noodleman's "my thursday poem" is a bit of an insult. Gnorm has written so much better than this.
— unknown
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