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pushing against
a white wall
a clean surface
smeared by the blood
of his work
golden body
turning black
from heat
his birth
than death
he cannot
crack the wall
that entombs him
in his own shell

19 Nov 05

Rated 10 (9) by 1 users.
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interesting. emotive dark poem. good development of blackening colour from white.
 — bettalpha

 — listen

nice poem...

maybe 'from heat' instead?


his birth
than death
 — varun

i like the way this reads now. thanks varun.
 — listen


 — unknown

i like your style very much. i have read a few of your poems,.....and like them all for what they were. u set aside rhythm and structure (not that u dont have it)...u seem to focus on whats really important,......emotion.
 — crismonblue

emotional appeal is my favorite type of writing i think. not the sentimental junk ... just a different viewpoint on emotion, or perhaps a completely different emotion all together ...

thanks for commenting.
 — listen